


so i’ll watch your life in pictures like i used to watch you sleep

by goodgirlfaith



Category: Scandal (TV)
Genre: AU, Angst, Established Relationship, F/F, Implied Relationships, Post Season 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-25
Updated: 2014-10-25
Packaged: 2018-02-22 12:02:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2507081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goodgirlfaith/pseuds/goodgirlfaith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>title from taylor swift's song, "last kiss"</p>
<p> "She worries about Mellie the whole time she’s away." <br/>Olivia worries about how Mellie is dealing with Jerry's death when she's gone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	so i’ll watch your life in pictures like i used to watch you sleep

She worries about Mellie the whole time she’s away. One night she wakes up at 2am and before her eyes can adjust to the lack of light she mistakes Jake for Mellie. She goes to kiss her cheek, and feels the roughness of Jake’s beard. Flinching, she turns over and moves as far away from Jake as she can in the queen sized bed, and faces the wall. She spends the rest of the nights on the island trying to pretend it never happened.

-

When she gets back to DC (and back on the grid), the first thing she does is see how Mellie’s doing. She can’t call her, or call Cyrus, or call anyone to ask how she is. So she has to rely on gossip websites and tabloids, and feels disgusting as she pours over websites and newsprint magazines that coat her fingers in ink and guilt.

She knew Mellie wouldn’t be doing well, mostly afraid she would turn to drinking, try and search for answers to her sons death at the bottom of the bottle. What Olivia sees is much worse.

Mellie’s given up, “Fuck It Mellie” some of the tabloids like to call her. Mellie’s been photographed all over the White House, wearing that kimono Liv loves, but with Uggs and an old t-shirt, and her hair a ratty mess.

Liv knows Mellie, knows how much she likes to pick out her outfits in the morning, wear her pearls, and have her hair done.

After an hour of reading the gossip, Liv grabs her phone. She pulls up Abby’s contact and her fingers hover over the number, itching to call. Itching to call Abby and ask how Mellie is doing. Ask if she needs anything. Ask if she’s been drinking all day. But she knows she can’t. When she left she burned all her bridges to the White House and Abby. She can’t just call and ask how Mellie’s doing without being bombarded by a million questions and accusations.

-

The first time she sees Mellie not in a tabloid, it’s at the State of the Union address. When Fitz talks about how much their family and Mellie is grieving, she mutters a “no fucking way” under her breath.

Seeing Mellie stand and get a standing ovation knocks the wind right out of Olivia. And her lip quivers when she notices all of Mellie’s body language.

This isn’t Mellie, apprehensive and almost hesitant to all the attention. The Mellie she knows loves attention, and especially undivided attention that months ago Mellie would have reveled in.

Liv stands backstage hoping that Mellie will come back after the speech, but she doesn't. Liv trys to tell herself she isn't disappointed. But she knows lying to herself is pointless.

-

The first time she sees Mellie in person is the morning after she picks up Karen. Mellie comes blazing down the White House hall, and yells her name.

Olivia stands there speechless as Mellie spits question after question out of her mouth about what she’s doing here, and why she’s here. And then Mellie grabs her arm and the feelings that she had been trying to pretend were gone rush back up. A jolt of electricity flows through her veins, her heart starts racing and she can barely say a word to Mellie before she’s gone just like that. Putting her hand to her heart, she takes a deep breath trying to calm her racing heart, puts her stoic face back on, and tries to focus on getting Karen’s sex tape from being released and not the fact that Mellie touching her made her feel more alive than she had in months.

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted on my tumblr 10/23/2014.   
> thanks for reading!


End file.
